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Reviews / Testimonials:

"Some friendships are bonds that can't be broken. 'Liaisons for Laughs: Angie & Ella's Summer of Delirium' tells the story of two best friends in a frank and entertaining method. A hilarious and endlessly entertaining collection of stories about the little things of life, 'Liaisons for Laughs' never stops its assault on the funny bone. A fine and entertaining novel, 'Liaisons for Laughs' is a choice pick for fiction readers."

-- Midwest Book Review (in "Small Press Bookwatch"; 5 stars on Amazon)

"...we absolutely love Robert Scott Leyse’s Liaisons for Laughs: Angie & Ella's Summer of Delirium. Leyse is the editor of the popular erotica website Sliptongue and his first book release is fun, steamy, and intelligent."

-- Ian and Alicia Denchasy, LA Weekly

“Licentious. Salacious. Those rich, naughty, mannered words from another era are given a cunning and contemporary twist in Leyse’s reinvigoration of a classic literary form--the epistolary. At a time when so many ‘real life’ intimacies are overlooked because we’re too tired to be seduced or to instigate some imaginative new direction in our mortgage anxious relationships, it’s refreshing to be reminded of the pleasures, prurient and also just plain human and often very funny, of overhearing other people’s intimacies. Fun and eroticism don’t go together nearly often enough. They do in Leyse tit for tat. This is clever, humane, word-sensual writing.”

-- Kris Saknussemm, author of Zanesville and Private Midnight

“You can feel the humidity in your own backyard as Angie and Ella soak up the summer in New York with various paramours with their super sexy, sex-positive attitudes. This is one of those books that, finally, puts sluts in their rightful places. They aren’t shameful or shamed. They’re proud of it, and having the time of their lives, and the reader will, too.”

-- Susan DiPlacido, author of 24/7 and House Money

“Liaisons for Laughs re-enlivens a venerable literary tradition, the epistolary novel, but now in an arousingly contemporary form. The erotic e-mails of these two libidinous heroines recount their escapades with wicked charm and droll humor. Their tales memorialize the lusty landscape of the New York corporate world, and the bratty sophistication of their narrative voices makes their sensual adventures all the more appealing. Angie and Ella are trollops for our time, and Robert Scott Leyse is a Trollope for our time.”

-- William T. Hathaway, author of A World Of Hurt and Summer Snow

Excerpt from Chapter V,
Circumstances of Spying

To return to Chapter Index click: HERE

_______________

V.1
Angie to Ella
Thursday, July 3, 2003 10:16 AM

Ella, it seems a girl isn’t safe from prying eyes anywhere, even when she’s in an office with the door locked! On Tuesday you heroically brought me my lifesaving clean up kit after Martin and I had made each other sweaty; you successfully avoided the notice of Rumsmann and Tramklin who were standing outside his door; you asked me: “So how do you feel now, knowing that those witches were so close?” Well, now I unfortunately answer: there’s more than those witches to worry about in this world of minefields! Guess what? By the time you arrived with my kit, the window of Martin’s office had already betrayed us!

The gist of it: some meddling morality-brainwashed busybody at the ad agency across the street witnessed the doings of Martin and I by means of the window and couldn’t rest easy conscience-wise until they’d phoned the firm and reported us! This worthy called Human Resources yesterday, doubtless knowing that’s the one place where tattling would be listened to and acted upon! I can hear the spy now: “This is a concerned citizen from the building across the street, on your west side. There’s—uh—some carnal activity being engaged in on a desk at your firm. Let’s see: eleven windows from the north side of your building, on the—I’ve counted from the base—forty-first floor. You might want to look into it.”

As to how it was discovered I was the girl involved: who knows? Did an HR stooge scamper up to investigate, inquire as to who was with Martin? Even more frightening: the said stooge could’ve been waiting to see who emerged from his office and seen you bring me my washy up stuff!

Poor Martin! He’s a year behind us, at the tail end of first-yeardom; he hasn’t had as much time to prove himself as I have, and now an indiscretion! And I’m the cause! Would you believe it? He phoned to apologize for bringing trouble on my head! I consider myself the more responsible party, by far; if I hadn’t listened to Linda’s mangling of the truth, teased him, baited him, tormented him... God! How could I have failed to note the danger of leaving the shades up, not anticipated the possibility of a witness?

I’m the one who apologized profusely; I told Martin, in no uncertain terms, to stop worrying on my account! To be irresponsible when I’m the sole person who’ll suffer the consequences is bad enough; to be irresponsible when others are at risk is an absolute disgrace!

Here’s the situation: Rikert, as my billing partner, has been informed of the matter; Laerfield, as Martin’s billing partner, has been informed of the matter. It doesn’t end there: a meeting of several partners (I have no idea know how many or which ones.) has been called to review the matter and decide what disciplinary action should be taken. I know this from Lenny of the Corporate Resources department who, as we know, always knows everything. (How he does I’ll never know, but that’s one of the unsolvable mysteries of the gossip pipeline, which is mystery and miracles itself! Yes, how news does travel; and what an oxymoron “Private and Confidential” is in this place! You want a secret to remain a secret? Then keep it to yourself or only tell a TRUSTED confidant (You’re my one and only within these walls!); otherwise, the whole place will know about it within an hour! I’d lay a bet the contents of every file in Human Resources has made it to the gossip pipeline and been bandied about at one time or another! “Private and Confidential”? What a joke!)

So that’s the story. The outcome of the meeting will be known after lunch, and I’ll get back to you with the verdict. Hopefully, I’ll have good news and we’ll be able to laugh about this later. But I’m by no means counting my laughs in advance: I’d rather not tempt fate.

Your,

TreacherouslyTattledUponTartlet

V.2
Ella to Angie
Thursday, July 3, 2003 10:32 AM

Angie, I’m aghast! Neither you nor Martin thought to pull the shades? Too mesmerized with one another, were you? So cute!—actually, NOT!

Alright, I’m going to plunge into the hallways and secretarial clusters to discover what I can, pick up on the prevailing mood, see which way the wind’s blowing.

Hang on a minute: I’m calling Martin!

Martin? He was laughing, making jokes—too proud to openly display the underlying worry I could detect in his voice! But such pride’s the sign of a strong man, right?

Damn that informant to the fourth round of the ninth circle of hell!

Be getting back to you soon.

Your,

PersonalPrivateInvestigator

V.3
Ella to Angie
Thursday, July 3, 2003 11:09 AM

A quick note, Honey, to let you know it’s my sincere feeling that, aside from unwanted attention that could ruin some future frolic opportunities, you have little to worry about. The feeling is this incident will blow over quickly, because it involves two hardworking attorneys who are always involved in important transactions.

More to follow, but I wanted to send this first.

Your,

ElatedElla

P.S. I’ll call Martin again, tell him the good news.

V.4
Angie to Ella
Thursday, July 3, 2003 11:39 AM

Thanks for the news, Dearest. As you may well imagine, Martin and I are lying low and remaining inside our offices until the verdict’s pronounced; not to mention that my deal’s likely to become active again later today and I’m awaiting instructions from Rikert—instructions that’ll hopefully contain no reference to the Martin matter.

The “Martin matter”! Why not phrase it correctly, as in: the delightful doings of Martin and I in his office Tuesday afternoon—my apology that rapidly transformed into titillation, as the room began to sway and dip and spin! How quickly I was gasp-panting in rutsville, purring and meowing like the SexCat I am! Then he’s shoving everything off his desk to make room for us—papers are fluttering to the floor! Soon I’m spread-eagled on the hardwood—my skin’s sticking to the surface, being uncomfortably stretched! (Sure could’ve used some oil!) But do I care? Ha, it’s no wonder I neglect to notice the shades haven’t been pulled! I’m too wildly agallop in my tummy whilst sucking Martin’s neck to even know my name! And, hey, look at me: I’m getting lost in HappyRecollectionLand! Rather a good sign, what? If I was truly quaking in my boots, I’d hardly have the leeway to flit about in scrumptious memories!

And guess what? I’m actually getting a kick out of sharing top-billing in today’s gossip feature! My pillar-of-virtue personality (Ha ha!) has succumbed to carnal yearnings—I’ve uncharacteristically cast modesty aside in the cause of lust—and all are telling of it, investing me with an aura of notoriety! (Is notoriety a bad thing? Ha! It’s free firm-wide publicity! I’ll be seen as being only human, plus it’ll give me an opportunity to counter any bad feelings towards me by being as sweetsy as sweet can be—an opportunity to win people over, and make new friends! People love to pass benediction, forgive! Everyone wants to be a priest!)

On the other hand... OK, this is me warning myself not to be stupid: “Stop gloating, Angie! You know better than to make light of an event that could erode the good standing you and Martin have heretofore enjoyed at the firm! You know better than to take your pardons for granted, assume there’ll be no unpleasant consequences! Especially, you know better than to allow yourself to enjoy a potentially disastrous situation, when there’s another person involved and you’re the one who’s primarily responsible for it! And, while it’s true that most people love to be given reasons to forgive, there are others who relish being judge and executioner! Think the informant across the street has any goodwill for you? There are others who have even less! Wake up, Angie! Stop being an overconfident and smug ninny!”

But, still, there’s undeniable satisfaction in being talked about firm-wide for having frolicked in an office! And the fact that there’s some apprehension mixed in; that I’m tense on account of the meeting that’s taking place, readying myself for the outcome... Well, that makes for some purrishly pleasant inner friction, despite my attempts to caution myself against enjoying it! Yes, the stimulating wait for the verdict! The fairly strong sense that all will end happily, coupled with the understanding that—in theory, at least—Martin and I could be shown the gate!

Notoriety? I can handle it! But for God’s sake let the Martin matter come to a sensible conclusion; and I’ll be such a good attorney for them! I mean, I already am—competitive me can’t be anything else; but if they handle this nicely, I’ll be so extra grateful—I’ll be such a stepping-up-to-the plate girl when it comes to putting in extra time, going that extra mile, bringing smiles to our clients’ faces! Because I happen to adore my job!

I was on the phone with Martin. He said: “There are worse things to be fired for, such as incompetence or a lack of social skills! To be fired in the cause of frolic: I’ll survive! Plenty of other guys are dying of envy, because I got to kiss the prettiest girl here!” You’re right: he is worried below the banter; but at least he’s able to indulge in the banter, keep the worry at bay! Damn! This shoddy business has to turn out well!

Eagerly awaiting your report!

Your,

Stimulatingly(DespiteMyself)StressedStrumpet

_______________

LIAISONS FOR LAUGHS:
ANGIE & ELLA'S SUMMER OF DELIRIUM
Excerpt from Chapter V,
Circumstances of Spying

Copyright © 2009
by Robert Scott Leyse
All rights reserved.

To return to Chapter Index click: HERE

 
 



All contents Copyright © 2007-2011 by Robert Scott Leyse. All rights reserved.